26 letters to Stephen: 4

Letter # 4: September 11, 2013

It has been a long time, Stephen. Far, far too long, and I am sorry.

I'm in the middle of week 14 of marathon training. For 12 weeks, things were going absolutely beautifully. Last week, a sinus infection threw a wrench in everything. This week, there have not yet been any disasters -- but there have been warning signs, and I am worried.

I'm going to tell you all about it, and soon. I promise. This weekend, I am going to write you a letter that is worth 10 letters. I promise.

But for right now, I just need to ask a favor.

Stay with me through these next couple of runs, will you? I am feeling whispers from my hips and knees that remind me of past injuries, and all I can think about is how quickly everything went to hell last time. I finished a 12-mile taper run, and suddenly my knee hurt like hell. Just like that. And it continued to hurt like hell until approximately 2 weeks after the race.

I survived. I even made it to the finish line and recovered without so much as a doctor visit. But it was so hard and I was so scared. Scared of quitting. Scared of hurting myself. Scared of having limited mobility. Scared of always wondering if I did the right thing.

I don't want to be scared like that again, especially since I will also be scared of failing you.

So stay with me. Keep my knees, hips, and feet functioning the right way for just a few more weeks. Keep me healthy, and I promise I'll do the rest.

I know it seems trivial to talk of this stuff as such a big deal, especially today. But it is a big deal, to me. So I'm just looking for help where I can get it.

You were always willing to give it.

I miss you.